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Indian stand-up comedian Biswa Kalyan Rath had a lot of words to say about the current situation of a young boy to tried suicide because of clinical depression. He says
I wrote an article concerning the boy that leapt from the home window as well as in the comments’ section of our Facebook page– among the differing views– were those that called him a coward, called him unreasonable for having jumped to his death when he “appeared abundant” as well as a criminal for having “eliminated his moms and dads, as well”
There were numerous tweets by influential celebrities who posted about how this is NOT the option; to talk and ask for help. These people are right. Depressed people should speak up and reach out for help. Only, they don’t. And it’s because of people who call it cowardice and criminal; people who, like Biswa Kalyan Rath, think that Depression is a switch you can flick on, or off, as and when you feel. Newsflash: It really isn’t
You don’t have to be downtrodden to be depressed; just like you don’t have to be pure hearted to be a politician. Back in the day, suicide cases did exist. However, because of a lack of a better understanding of mental health as an existing issue, it boiled down to unhappiness, break-ups, failures and so on. People always associated suicidal depression with a legitimate reason. If you’re rich, have parents to provide you with a roof over your head, a well-paying job, a happening social life, thousands of friends and enough romantic attention, you cannot be depressed. Why? Because society says so. A society with such a shallow understanding of what Depression really is, thinks it knows everything and can, therefore call the shots on whether or not you are depressed. And society is largely made up of people like Biswa Kalyan Rath and thick-headed robots who can’t see beyond the surface.
Depression was never above the surface. It’s probably why everyone never understood it sooner. Our government is finally waking up, of course. However, our societal dogmas and our orthodox ways of thinking aren’t. So, I’ll just break it down for you.
This Is What Depression Isn’t
It’s not being sad because your girlfriend/boyfriend broke up with you.
It’s not being sad because you failed school, or college, or important exams.
It’s not being sad because you hate your job.
It’s not being sad because you don’t make enough money.
It’s not something you choose.
It’s not telling someone ‘I’m so depressed today’ in the most ignorantly lighthearted way.
It’s not sulking.
It’s not planned.
It’s not intentional.
It’s not being childish.
This Is What Depression Really Is
It’s like being haunted by the invisible.
It’s like falling, even when you’re sitting perfectly well on a very sturdy chair.
It’s like sinking under water when you’re breathing in clean air.
It’s like suffocating on pure air.
It’s like a well with no bottom to it.
It’s painless and yet, excruciating.
It’s like having all the wealth in the world and having nothing to do with it.
It’s like having a well-laid table in front of you with no will to eat.
It’s like having a hospital take exceptional care of you and still not wanting to live.
It’s infinite and formless.
You could be the one with the heartiest laugh and still feel like all you want to do is cry. You can be the most popular person in your friends’ circle and still feel like you’re all alone in the world. You could have the world at your feet and still feel like you don’t want to be in this world. No, it doesn’t need to have a reason. You could be getting ready to go out for the evening, feeling pumped and excited about it; and then, find yourself sitting at the edge of the bed and staring out of the window, just moments later, simply because you can feel yourself sink lower and lower from within. And you know what the strange part is? It’s that you don’t even know why you’re feeling that way. You try to pick out the reason but, really there isn’t any. You can be perfectly calm and composed one moment, on the ride home from work and find your face wet with tears pouring out of your eyes the very next moment and you don’t know why you’re crying. You probably don’t even want to. But, it feels like the right thing to do.
Depression is like a ghost that attaches itself to you. At first, you don’t really realize its presence around because it’s faint; still trying to find its source of energy from within you. Then, slowly, you started noticing slight changes that you didn’t make. Someone else made those changes. And while you know that those changes came from within you, you also know it wasn’t entirely you…yet. You’re still afraid to acknowledge its presence, though because you’re afraid you’ll validate it; bring it to life. And so, you choose to go on denying it, without realizing how it’s slowly taking over your soul.
And then, as nights change to days, you notice how you don’t feel like getting out of bed in the morning. Or, worse still; you don’t feel like waking up at all. Your eyes open, and your first thought is, “I don’t want to be awake.” And that’s not just for another minute, or an hour, or even a day. It’s for always. You come to embrace the darkness of slumber. You prefer the lights out because it’s easier to not notice the wreckage you’ve become. It’s easier to stay quiet in the presence of others because you’re afraid you might just start crying if you had to utter words. And so, you fake it. You’ll fake the smile and you’ll work so hard at it, you’ll almost believe it’s real. You’ll try to drown yourself in your work because you’re afraid of having any free time, lest you might slip right back into the crack. Depression is that crack in the wall. It gets bigger and deeper. And when it’s deep enough to peak into, you’re afraid to peak lest you scare the monster out in the open. But, little do you know that the monsteris within. And it’s not a monster at all. It’s just you…with a hollow pit where there once existed a soul. More and more, you sink deeper into a shell that you’ve helped the invisible create. And the invisible has no form. Depression has no set form, or pattern. It is what it is—the feeling of sinking lower and lower into an abyss—the width or shape of the crack, the well, or the ghost doesn’t matter.
Inside, it’s all endless.
It’s not like you don’t want to talk; it’s more like you can’t. You can barely recognise yourself. You don’t look into the mirror because you’re not there anymore. It’s no longer a life; it’s just mechanics. And you can’t wait for it to end… But it doesn’t just end, one fine day. It isn’t like a relationship or a test. It’s more like a wheel; it goes on. It can slow down… Yes, it can also be stopped. But, it can be revved up again.
How do you deal with it?
If you’re lucky, you find someone to talk to. If you’re lucky, someone tries to talk to you. If you’re lucky, you find a therapist and if you’re really lucky, the medication will help. If you’re blessed, you’ll be surrounded by loved ones who actually understand that they might never understand; and yet, they’ll stick around for you. Sometimes, you find a way to stop the while, get off the vehicle and walk. Sometimes, you’ll find a way to seal the crack in the wall. Sometimes, you will find a way to climb out of that well… Or, at the very least, stay afloat.
Other times, you can’t stop the vehicle. You can’t seal the crack in the wall and you see it crumble around you while you stand helpless. Other times, you don’t get to climb out of the well because you’re so tired of staying afloat that you can’t help but give in. Other times, you become so numb, it hurts. Other times, all you want is for the numbness to go away so you can stop the hurt. Other times, the only end you see, is the end you give it. Other times, the only way out is on the other side.
Depression isn’t something you figure out, like a virus that’s infecting your body. It’s like cancer that cannot be seen and therefore, cannot be operated. It’s not something you can switch off and on; it isn’t a mood. It’s a state. It can be helped; but, only if we stop stigmatising it; only if we stop tweeting and posting about our own stupid notions and beliefs about the illness; only if we treat it less like a dirty secret and more like a chronic illness. It can’t be helped if you choose to brush it off. It can’t be helped if you call it stupid, cowardice and criminal. Depression isn’t about a stupid person being stupid. It’s about a living and breathing person losing his/her soul… and with it, the will to live…
Depression doesn’t happen when your life is falling apart; it happens when you’re life is perfectly fine. Depression is why your life starts falling apart and you can’t do anything about it.
Meet our specialist for a detailed assessment and customised Homeopathy treatment to help you get over depression. Visit one of our clinics today or consult our specialists online.